Providing Emotional Support to Colleagues
We spend a significant portion of our lives at work, often side by side with our colleagues. Over time, we notice their routines, their moods, and even their energy levels. At times, something may seem ‘off’ — a usually cheerful teammate turns withdrawn, someone’s performance suddenly dips, or a colleague seems unusually tired or irritable.
How can we be there to support this individual when we notice such changes?
1. Notice Without Judging
Look for signs that may signal to you that this individual might be struggling. Be observant, not intrusive. Has there been a change in their behavior, mood, or engagement?
- Withdrawing from social interactions
- Increased irritability or low mood
- Frequent absenteeism or lateness
- A drop in performance or focus
- Appearing physically exhausted or overwhelmed
Remember: noticing isn’t about diagnosing—it’s about being human and attentive.
2. Reach Out Privately and Gently
Choose a quiet, private setting to check in. Approach the conversation with empathy, not assumptions.
“Hey, I’ve noticed you’ve seemed a bit different lately. Just wanted to check in—how are you doing?”
“I care about you and wanted to see if everything’s okay. No pressure to share, but I’m here if you want to talk.”
Sometimes, just knowing someone cares can be comforting.
3. Listen More Than You Speak
Sometimes, we might rush to problem solve. If your colleague opens up, listen without trying to fix. We do not need to have all the answers. What matters more is being there for the person we’re trying to support.
- Offer your full attention
- Listen without judging
- Validate their experience (e.g., “That sounds really tough.” “Thanks for sharing that with me.”)
4. Encourage, Don’t Push
If it feels appropriate, gently encourage them to seek support—whether from HR, a supervisor, or the company’s Employee Assistance Programme (EAP).
You might say:
“Have you thought about talking to someone about this? There are support services that could really help.”
“Our EAP is confidential — maybe it’s worth exploring?”
Let them lead the pace of the next step.
5. Respect Their Boundaries
Not everyone will feel ready to talk, and that’s okay. Don’t force the issue or keep checking in excessively.
- Remind them they’re not alone
- Leave the door open – let them know you’re available if they ever want to talk
6. Be Mindful of Your Own Limits
Supporting others can be emotionally taxing. Check in with your own well-being, too. You can care for someone while still setting healthy boundaries.
“If we fill our own tank first, we then have the ability to use our reserves to help other people.”
If needed, speak to your manager or HR for guidance—especially if you’re concerned about your colleague’s safety or if their behavior is affecting the wider team.
Being a supporter for the people around us does not require much. Sometimes, a caring question, a listening ear, or a small act of kindness can be the lifeline someone needs. Choosing to notice and reach out is a powerful act of empathy—and it makes the workplace safer and more human for everyone.
